A promise to myself.

I don't know what's going on with me. I've been skipping way too much and it's been affecting my grades, I realized school is way more important then friends because these friends wont give me a future, school will and I need to start focusing more and get my grades up in all my classes and make sacrifices because this is my time to do good in school. I need to stop having distractions like Facebook, Twitter , my Blackberry :( it needs to go. I need to do this. I promise to myself till the end of the year to focus on  me and my study's and what I really need to do. No more SKIPPING.

Hmm.

 So, you can pay $92,735,012 on a commercial for starving kids, but you can't feed them?

Honestly just think about it. It makes me so mad instead of paying that much for a commercial pay for food to feed the starving kids and family and help the kids who are taking care of the family because they loss a parent. With that much money they could feed the hole contenent and it upsets me so much that they do things like that. To be really honest no one cares about the commercials when they see it they just switch it some do. It honestly upsets me so much when I found out the price on how much they pay for a commercial my mouth drop. I think if people did something about this and made a difference that $92,735,012 would go to the kids instead to the commercial THAT DOES NOTHING FOR THEM.

I what I have learnt from this is enjoy what you have in life because as you can see other kids don't have anything not even a grain a food. Appreciate everything you have and don't take things for granted.

Scholarship;

Well I dint get the scholarship and to be quite honest I’m fine with it because ME myself I know that I was a winner, I put so much time and work into it and the fact that I don’t give up and cry about not winning  show’s that I’m maturing and understanding the concept about life, you’re not going to get everything you want even if you work hard for it but that doesn’t mean you need to give up it just means try harder and put your head up high and stand tall and try again, because when one door closes another one opens and then you go for it! But I will admit it’s a bit upsetting but hey what can I do? It’s part of life right. You just have to accept it and move on.  On the plus side I got a kick ass essay written and now I know how to write a good essay.  Also I actually worked hard on something I wanted to do! And no procrastinate! And I want to thank Mr. David and Mme. Cassidy for helping me through this and giving me the courage that I needed so thank you! 

Being grounded;

I honestly hate being grounded, it sucks for the past week I was grounded from EVERYTHING, going outside, internet, having friends over, the television. It sucked so much I don’t think I could ever be so bored in my life. As my parents say you don’t want to do the time then don’t do the crime simple as that, but when you’re a kid or a teenager it just goes through one ear and out the other honestly.

I’ll admit sometimes I like being grounded because if I have important projects to do and homework instead of being distracted by other things I can concentrate on my homework and projects J but then again who wants to do homework all the time? Not me! Ha-ha. Now I know not to do anything to get myself grounded again! I need to go out! I hate being stuck inside a house with nothing to do... I could go crazy.

I have learnt my lesson not to get grounded and to do what my parents ask because I’m the type of person who doesn’t like to do the time! So now I will listen to my parents and do what they ask me to do instead of ignoring the fact that there just showing me or teaching me something important in life and they do it because they care and not because there out to get me.

Dating

Everyday I see people getting into new relationships or old with a love one,  it makes me happy to see that everyone can be happy with someone else in there life, but I find that I am way happier alone for now, I’m not saying I won’t date in the future but I am happy single. I can concentrate more on school and focus on what I really want instead or having to worry about my boyfriend and getting frustrated over stupid conflicts. At first I thought you NEEDED to have a boyfriend because in high school everyone is dating and it’s the in thing.

 But honestly I don’t want a high school relationship I want a real mature one instead of a relationship that will last up to 5 months and then breaking up in the end because you found someone new.

 A relationship to me is something you share with someone you love or like; it’s not all about sex or doing couple stuff it’s more then that and US teenagers don’t know what love is or a real serious relationship we think we do but we don’t and that’s what teen’s these days they think because your with someone means you can just abuse to word love but you can’t because you don’t even love the guy, you only like him.

These are main things you need to do to have a serious relationship;

-          Put in the effort to make it work.

-          Be honest and open.

-          Respect each others views .

-          Be there when the other person needs you, listen and try to understand and help.

-          Give each other space - everybody has moods or a bad day once in a while - it's normal and usually nothing to do with you personally, just life in general. [1]

Teen’s these days think that relationships are supposed to be perfect when they are not, you are certainly going to have your “up’s and downs “and disagree with your partner that’s what it’s all about if you guy’s never fought your relationship would be so boring! So don’t be afraid to tell your feelings and express yourself about your opinions.

“Lust is easy.  Love is hard.  Like is most important.  ~Carl Reiner”[2]

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[1] http://www.connexions-direct.com/index.cfm?pid=153&catalogueContentID=381

[2] http://www.quotegarden.com/relationships.html

the gym!

I recently joined the gym last Friday and since them I have been so obsessed with it. I love it so much it feels so good to just know you are trying to get in shape, I go everyday after school and at 7 so I go 2 times a night! And I enjoy it I’ve been working on my stomach and my legs so 30 minutes on each and I also do cardio witch I enjoy, I need it so much at the moment or my fire fighting job in the summer witch I’m really excited for I get paid 20 grand for 2 months. Back to the gym it has really me focused on what I want and to follow my ambitions. I eat healthier now witch I love I can focus more in school now I’m not always so tired and wanting to go to bed. When I eat crap I feel sick and feel so lazy that I don’t want to do anything and that’s not how I want to live my life, I want to be active and very healthy and pick better choices of what I want in my life. The gym has helped me do that.

Girls and their body.

   I recently have noticed a lot of girl’s disrespecting their bodies and how they present themselves to the public. I wonder if it's because they think men will love it or because there self esteem is very low, I don’t know. Every day I wonder to myself  how can young girls do this at this age or even in general, your body is so sacred to you it’s the only thing in your life that you respect. In other cases girls think their body is just a thing to sexually attract men by showing parts that should be kept revealed. It’s also a cry for attention or help, a lot of girls use this method to feel loved by guys, to get attention from the public. What they don’t realize is there sending out a bad reputation for them and their body. It honestly gets me so frustrated to see this because at the same time these girls do want to get respected but how is that going to work if they can’t respect themselves? I’ve seen a lot of these girls get pregnant, raped, abused, turn to drug use. Honestly girls you want a good life not a miserable life! So get yourself together, yes it’s nice to feel beautiful but there are so many ways to show it and feel it without getting half naked on site’s and in public places. You’re body is yours, it’s sacred it’s something that god gave you it’s a privilege. Please girls who are going through this please think about what you are doing to yourself and how it will affect your life. 

"Sexy doesn't have to be a tan blonde girl showing off her goodies." -Hayley Williams.

Wow things like this make you think.

I just read in another blog that this girl named Laura Szendrei, 15 years old was beaten to death with a baseball bat in September 2010.


Honestly what is wrong with the world these days? Killing an innocent girl because of your problems isn't going to solve your problems let me tell you that right now. It's just going to cause you a bigger situation then what you had before. I don't understand how people can just take another human's life? a family member a friend a brother or a sister, how do they do it? Do they not think of how the family and friends who cared about this person will feel, no they don't they just do it anyways without thinking and it get's me so upset. KILLING IS NOT GOING TO RESOLVE ANYTHING.


Like gangs for instant they kill to prove who is better and tougher honestly who cares? if you have muscles and guns and the other gangs don't why are you killing people to prove yourself? All you are doing is making your self seem like a horrible person you will not be liked, some people kill other's for insecurity there are other ways to fix your insecurities then taking someone else's life this hole subject really frustrates me and gets me sad! because I do not get it. What are you people thinking? like ugh I wish sometimes this would just all end the hate that happens all over the world and that we could fix conflicts some other way then killing and beating up people it's horrible! 


I think we should all do something about it then saying how much we hate it, we should try and stop violence or help someone when something like this is about to happens instead of just taking video's and cheering it on, because when one person end's up dead you're not cheering anymore aren't you? Din't think so.


The influence we now have from the media like music, movies or what we even see on the news is affecting teens and adults to think that beating up and doing stuff like this is alright it's not! And instead of teens thinking that Lil Wayne or Chris Brown is a good role model because they kill and beat up people I think they should have a more Positive role model such as Martin Luther King he's the one who stand up and said enough is enough! he stopped racism by just speaking and doing things differently. Racism is one of the main things also because you're black or white it doesn't matter were all humans were all the same just because another is a different color doesn't mean they aren't good enough or worthless were all the same and we should appreciate  each other because to be honest this is the same people you're going to see everyday all different colors all different race so live with it you can't change it , get over you're hate and learn to love all types of people.


All i'm saying is get over the hole killing thing it's not going to give you power over anything. Life is too short for negativity and hate! live life happy and positive!


and R.I.P too Cris T, Jesse G , Laura S & to everyone else who was killed because of something so horrible and stupid.

A little about me :)

Lately everyone is so confused about who they are and what is there purpose on this planet. Well i discovered who I am what I'm not trying to be. I am a person who loves adventures, risk and is willing to take the fall but at times I am emotional, and complicated. I'm not perfect and i'm not trying to be either. I ust to think being popular was the way of life now it doesn't mean anything to me anymore, but honnestly at this point I'm not here to look for new best friends I already have the people I need in my life. I do love meeting new people so don't be shy! but i'm not here to impress anyone for them to like me , if you don't like me then that's your problem. honnestly life is too short for negativity so just save it ! I've also realized, is not about walking on tip-toes. It's not about being afraid, it's about taking risks and opportunities. It's about sharing who you are with the world, it's about patience, and it's all about giving it a go. It's about admiring what others can to for the world too! I can't be afraid to make a mistake, or worry about what someone else will think of me if I stay true to how I feel, otherwise I'll hardly ever get that feeling of contentment.

Oh do I love this weather.

Today is a rainy day! I love it so much because I love being in the mood of getting into my pyjamas and snuggling in my room with green tea and listening to some John Mayer. I can’t do that today; I’m stuck in school working on my business project for English! Don’t get me wrong I love school but sometimes I wish I could just take a break from life and sit down and relax. I’m always so busy I never really have time for myself anymore. My scholarship is due next Friday I’m so nervous! I really want this and need it! I would be will to do anything for it! I really need the money since it’s so hard to find a job when you have no experience, it really does upset me. Like how am I supposed to get experience if you won’t hire me? Like honestly but I will keep trying I won’t give up! That’s for sure. This weekend I did see a movie that was so funny Sex and the City I actually liked that movie a lot it was good J this weekend more school work and essay ahh, life is so much fun...not.

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Oh my god I haven’t wrote one of these in a long time! Even though this counts for my grade!  I have been so busy with all my other school work and scholarship trying to get an 87 average is harder then I thought I basically don’t have time for anything anymore it sucks! I wish school wasn’t so hard and it could be easy. I miss having nap times and recess now its work, work, work! I promise to keep writing blogs everyday! I’m trying to get this scholarship so badly but I suck at writing essays with my life. I do have good teachers like Mr. David & Mr. Mclean to help me! Thank goodness for that! Well to talk about my week it has been very busy working out every day, doing home work I’m actually scared now of the future I’m afraid I just might break down in the end.

Dear Sara..

When you are yongue you learn a lot of DO'S and DON'Ts what I really learnt was STAY beside your parents when you are in a public place because you never know what could happend. As exemple I went to a mall with my mom one day and something caught my eye and I tottaly just left my mom's side to go see it. When i turned back to go to my mom she wasn't there anymore so i started to cry and freak out that I would never see her again then I went to the information booth and asked them to help me find my mom ! it took a while but i found her and oh did i ever get in so much trouble. I've never been that scared in my life and now I know I will always stick by my moms side!

Life is not an easy task.

Since the first day I thought about colleges and universities and what I want to be after high school it’s got me thinking that life isn’t what I thought it would be. That everything would come to me so easily that I would get a job and have all the money for college and that I would get accepted at any schools but really when you think about it you have to work for things you want. Life won’t give it to you just like that and that’s what really scared me that I would not get anywhere because of my past and how I dint so well in school. Now I am working my butt off to get what I want because I have seen some people just give up there life on like that and not get anywhere. I don’t want to be like those people I want to work so hard that I will appreciate everything I have in life and that I will be happy in the end. What I am trying to say is don’t take life for granted and work hard because trust me you will feel lost and scared like I did.